Lovemaking and dating after 50

  • Census: Third are divorced, widowed, separated or never married
  • Survey: Many older people are sexually active
  • (LifeWire) — Like 20- or 30-something singles, older guys and women are dating and embracing their sexiness. But many older singles — some of whom have already bot down the aisle — aren’t looking to exchange their single status for a betrekking of gold.

    Some older Americans are looking for companionship rather than marriage.

    &quot,Wij are not aiming for good switches te the 2nd half of life, but looking for fulfillment te who wij are now,&quot, says Sharon Romm, a Seattle-based psychiatrist and author of &quot,Dating After 50: Negotiating the Minefields of Midlife Romance.&quot,

    &quot,Not everyone wants another marriage. Someone might want a companion for going to concerts on Saturday night and not much more. Others might absolutely want — or not want — lovemaking spil part of another relationship.&quot,

    More than a third of Americans overheen 50 are divorced, widowed, separated or have never married, according to a tally of statistics released te 2006 by the U.S. Census Kantoor.

    &quot,Many overheen 50 are no longer looking for that one person, that ‘soul mate’,&quot, says Dr. Philip Belove, a marriage and family therapist based ter Bellows Falls, Vermont, who specializes ter midlife relationships issues. &quot,If you have a life that you like and things you want to do and interests to pursue, maybe you don’t want to sacrifice some of those priorities ter order to be someone else’s soul mate.&quot,

    This sentiment doesn’t just apply to confirmed bachelors, either. For many women, their careers and hobbies rank higher on their priority list than do romantic relationships, according to Belove.

    Spil Margaret Murchie, a 52-year-old realtor te Honolulu, Hawaii, a self-proclaimed independent woman who dates but has never bot married, puts it simply, &quot,They have to make mij more satisfied than I am now on my own.&quot,

    A 2003 AARP investigate of Three,501 singles aged 40 to Sixty-nine displayed that about one-third of those surveyed were either te a relationship or dating one person exclusively. A comparable percentage had dated one or more people ter the previous three years. But of those who were dating, just 8 procent listed &quot,to find someone to marry&quot, spil their reason for doing so. Indeed, 49 procent said they were simply looking for someone &quot,to talk to and do things with.&quot,

    Of course, dating isn’t always effortless, particularly for those who may be dipping back into the dating pool after years on the sidelines. But there are many ways for older Americans to meet and get to know one another, many geared specifically to their cohort:

    &#8226, Online dating and social networking sites, like BOOMj.com, SeniorFriendFinder.com, Match.com and eHarmony.com help seniors find like-minded people with whom they can connect.

    &#8226, Travel programs, such spil Elderhostel offerande learning adventures worldwide.

    &#8226, Volunteer programs, like the Senior Corps, connect those with community service programs ter need.

    &#8226, Competitive and recreational sports programs, such spil Sports for Active Seniors ter Madison, Wisconsin, and the Westelijk Virginia Senior Sports Classic, target active older adults.

    Sexual evolution or revolution?

    Just spil older Americans aren’t letting the years zekering them from dating, they’re not letting it end their hook-up lives, either.

    Many of the Trio,005 U.S. adults aged 57 to 85 surveyed for a explore published te the Fresh England Journal of Medicine (NEJM) reported having hookup at least merienda within the past year:

  • 73 procent of people aged 57 to 64
  • 53 procent of those aged 65 to 74
  • 26 procent of those aged 75 to 85
  • Among the oldest group of sexually active adults, 54 procent were having hookup at least twice a month, while 23 procent reported engaging te hookup at least merienda a week.

    The examine published August 23 defines lovemaking very loosely to include mutual activity that doesn’t require intercourse.

    &quot,It is time that our society’s traditional thinking that disconnects old age and hookup be revisited,&quot, says Ruth S. Jacobowitz, author of &quot,150 Most-Asked Questions About Midlife Lovemaking, Love, and Proximity.&quot, &quot,Wij’re all living longer, so our needs to relate sexually are lasting longer.&quot,

    But older Americans who are sexually active face health issues, too.

    &#8226, Albeit HIV/AIDS is a threat to Americans of all ages, about Nineteen procent of Americans infected with HIV/AIDS are 50 or older, according to the U.S. government’s National Institute on Aging (NIA). The NIA doesn’t pauze down transmission rates among this demographic — for example, through drug use, heterosexual or mariquita voeling — but the institute does point out that older adults ter normal tend to know less than junior Americans about how HIV/AIDS is transmitted and the necessity of using condoms. They are also less likely to be tested for the disease.

    &#8226, Aging can affect sexual spectacle. Both studs and women may find that it takes longer to become excited spil they grow older, according to the National Institutes of Health (NIH). This may be caused by health problems like heart disease, by medications being taken to treat health conditions, or simply by stress or concerns about a switching appearance spil one ages.

    &#8226, The NIH notes that women ter the midst of menopause, which causes estrogen levels to decline, may practice ache during intercourse. Contrary to a commonly held assumption, however, a examine by the Fresh England Research Institute and the University of Massachusetts Medical Schoolgebouw te 2000 found that lower estrogen levels did not lower a woman’s libido.

    &#8226, Te boys, aging can cause impotence. About Five procent of studs aged 40 report having this problem, and it increases to about 15 procent of boys aged 70, according to the Massachusetts Masculine Aging Examine. E-mail to a friend

    LifeWire provides innovador and syndicated lifestyle content to Web publishers. Jocelyn Voo is a freelance verslaggever and relationships editor at the Fresh York Postbode.

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